Welcome to the Genderology Association
Genderology: The study of gender and how it affects people whom have a discrepancy between their perceived gender and their true gender identity.
Mission: To gather and distribute information about gender dysphoria, also known as gender identity disorder, and the way to gain psychological help as well as other forms of assistance including but not limited to physicians and clinicians who specialize, or assist those people who have needs in this specific area.
The Genderology Association was formed from the idea that service providers, and their clients should have an easy way to find one another. Currently there is no other system available which allows an individual to search for a specific type of service provider, obtain information about that provider's practice like rates, privacy, insurance and more. More over, there are no current systems which rate the service providers in their knowledge of transsexual specific needs like what hormone dose is best for a specific individual. In addition, there are some service providers that work with transsexuals but really do not prefer that clientele, and therefore finding the service providers whom are more accepting makes the visit with the service provider more comfortable for both the service provider and the client.
The question to ask yourself is, how do you know who you can trust to be a good practitioner, without guessing? Anyone can look up a doctor on their insurance's website, but does that doctor know about what the patient needs? Not all Endocrinologists have studied transgender issues or how to medicate them.
The Genderology Directory is a single place to look for the latest research, news and other information both in your communities and around the world. Should you move out of state, or out of your area, you may need to find new support and services, which can push your time line back... This association gives you a way to know that the practitioner in your area will understand you and your needs, without "trying them out" and finding that the practitioner really does not know much about transgender at all.
At this time there are no fees for our services. If you are a service provider who is not listed with us, please feel free to add a service provider and we will verify and list you in our database.
Would you like to know more about the creators of this association?
Continue reading for a little of My Story
You may wonder why I have decided to start this website, or what drives a person like me. You may be a religious person who authentically wants to understand other people and why they are the way they are, or maybe you have a family member you don't understand. There are plenty of reasons to read through this website, but this will show you my reasons for sharing the information with you...
I grew up in the 70's and 80's when nothing was really known about transsexuals in the mainstream. They were considered freaks and people who just wanted to be outcasts. I can safely assure you, that my parent was neither a freak, nor did she want to be an outcast. She was a rebel though, and she only wanted to be herself. That was something that she was to me, every day of her life. To other people though, she was very different. Her family had a hard time accepting the fate of their son. By the time he was 30, they had a second daughter that they didn't even know they had. My mother was blamed and banished from the house. While we visited at my grandparents, she waited in the car... I personally couldn't have done that, but she did... My grandmother told her friends, her friends told their kids, their kids told their kids (who were my age), and my sister and I were picked on for having a 'freak' in the family... It wasn't until I was starting into my teens, and yet another new school (my mother, sister and I moved around a lot) that I came up with the idea of calling my parent my Aunt... It helped explain the reason for talking about her all of the time, and why I was so close to her, and that she wasn't my mother. My Mom would have had my head if she heard me allow anyone to think that Debbie was my mom.
Debbie worked in a power plant at Florida Power and Light all of my life. She was damn good at her job, and was respected by most of her peers. Of course, being a good 'ole boy club that the power plants are, she had her share of problems. She was renowned for knowing the information on where any hurricane was going to go. She was getting the hurricane forecasts from the NHC using Prodigy of all things, when it was popular... She was my mentor, the person I wanted to be like when I grew up... I didn't want her problems of transgenderism, but I wanted to be strong and damn good at what I did. I also wanted to be as caring and compassionate as she was, but in that area I think I'm more like my mother who is even more caring and compassionate... I really did land some great parents, even with the familial differences! Debbie also had a knack for reading people. She could take 5 minutes of talking to someone and determine if they were a good person or if I need not bother taking time with them. She was right about everyone... The last person she met was my current spouse whom she said was a keeper... In so many ways she was right; however there was a slight flaw...
After a family conflict, Debbie died on February 14, 1997... She was looking at losing everything because the people where she worked were not accepting her and she forced her way in. They found any reason they could to make life difficult and to find a reason to get rid of her. She already felt like she lost the whole family including me. I was her support structure, and had already told her that I needed time, but there was never a Christmas that I had not at least called. I know she wanted to hear from me, I felt it deep down, but I didn't listen and was never able to speak to her again... That is something I truly regret. I truly miss her...
At this point, I thought that there was nothing to keep the kids from having a normal family life, and family structure... There would be no reason for the kids to believe anything different until they were older and told the truth. They would never have to deal with friends thinking their family was weird, or any of the hardships I had. At least this was a good thing that would come of Debbie's death for both me and my sister. I always did try to look at the bright side of things... In 1998 I was married for the 2nd time to my now spouse. Everything was great, it was grand and I was on top of the world and nothing could hold me down... We tried for a year to have our son, however no sooner than I was about 2 months pregnant the other foot dropped. As it turns out, my spouse is transsexual and is trying to figure the problem out. I knew about the cross dressing and I was okay with that... To me, it just wasn't that big of a deal... But to find out then, all I could do was cry... I couldn't be angry; I just cried and tried to understand why... Why choose now to tell me? Because I helped force it out... I couldn't figure out why my spouse was sinking further and further into depression, why life was holding no joy when we had everything... He never acted like himself anymore, and said that he didn't know how. He'd played the part for so long, he didn't know who he was inside anymore. I Okayed the search for the truth, not knowing what might come of it... The journey to the truth gave me answers that I never realized I wanted to know. I never truly understood why Debbie was the way she was, and I never did the research... Now I understand that it wasn't a choice, it was a matter of changing, or going crazy... Which would you choose? Is that really a choice?
I spent our second anniversary in the hospital having our son... I watched as my husband became a Dad and as much as he feared breaking or dropping our son, he took him and it was a great thing to watch... All of the things that he didn't understand with the girls, he started to learn... Life would be different... We soon decided to move to Seattle. The support structure was out there for a family like us, well, at least there was support for the significant others (SO's) and for the transsexuals themselves... The girls (mine from my previous marriage) were another matter all together. Nobody seemed to have groups for them to talk to other kids their ages... I looked for years, and never did find the resources I so desperately wanted for them. I talked to them as much as they wanted to talk, and even when they didn't. I tried to help them understand the reactions I received when I was a kid, and was glad that the other parents did not have the same reaction of not wanting their kids to play with mine. I made one VERY good friend and we would each do sleep-overs... Neither of us had family in town so it was an awesome deal... From the beginning, I felt like I could trust her, and she was the first to know about our 'familial situation'.
In September 2000, we moved to Seattle. Within 3 months of moving to Seattle, my spouse changed her name, and started living part time. Within another 3 months she was living full time and had a new job. By the following September she moved into an apartment across the way and we were separated, I was devastated. I had the perfect life, the house, the yard, the kids, the husband. I lost it all... The next two years were hell between bitter jealousy and fights... The thing we were able to do was keep our differences away from the kids.
Out of all of this, you would think that most people would go running into the streets, hoping to be hit by a bus. When I told my mother, she told me to come home, and start over again... to just leave... She'd already been through it and it killed her to see me going through it and knowing what I was in for and she still hates Wendy for doing this to me and the kids. When my sister-in-law was told, she told me to take the baby and run, don't even look back. Me, I want others to understand, and to be able to live with families like mine who are different. Would you let your kids play with my kids because my kids have two Moms? Would you make the automatic assumption that the two moms are lesbians? Would you bother to talk to me after you heard about my family? Would you bother letting your kids play with my kids? Would you be closed minded about it? Or would you want to know why, and want to understand why our family is different? Would you ask the questions, or be too embarrassed?
For those who are very religious, and have the wonderful WWJD, or the "Teach a man to fish" fish emblem on their cars, can you tell me, "What Would Jesus Do?".... Right now, I do believe I'm teaching not one, but many to fish, so that they might be able to feed themselves knowledge for many years to come...
Thank you in advance for your time.
Copyright © 2004 Genderology.org All Rights Reserved.
Published on: 2004-11-09